You better change that attitude mister! (or missy!) I think I’ve been told that more times than I’ve have the privilege of waking up (especially during my teen years).
I can remember thinking “Change my attitude? You’re the one who’s making me mad!” Now that I’m older, and wiser, I realize that they didn’t make me mad. I was the one who chose my attitude or chose to be angry. In that moment I decided that whatever they did, was more important than my happiness and my well-being.
Anger has been related to cardiovascular disease, Atherosclerosis and high blood pressure. The next time someone makes you angry we challenge you to look at yourself and ask why you are choosing this attitude, this anger, over your own joy and health.
Do we need to remind you? We will. Your attitude is yours and yours alone. No one, no thing can change or impact your attitude other than you. You are the only one who controls it period. No one can “make you mad”.
Don’t believe us? Think about that person that you know who always seem to be so happy. You know that person. The one who’s glass is always half full. That friend or colleague who everyone refers to as the one with the bubbly personality.
Some may say “they were just born like that.” Maybe they were. Or maybe they chose an attitude of joy, gratitude, and resolution in every circumstance. Maybe when they are in the only open, and long line, at the grocery store. They chose to see it as an opportunity to get on social media and chat with friends or even make new acquaintances while waiting. Maybe when someone says harsh words to them, they chose to be curious about that person and wonder why they feel the need to say such things. Maybe they chose to understand why the person is so upset and see the opportunity to improve their own actions to better the relationship.
Now think about that person who everyone refers to as Debbie Downer. You know that person. The one who seems to complain about everything, never seems to be happy. That whoa is me guy or gal. We bet you immediately thought of specific people. Why do they have the same consistent bad attitude? It’s simple. Because they chose to have that bad attitude. They chose to focus on the challenge rather than the solution.
“I hate my job!” By the way, if you don’t like your job, you have choices. You could choose to see all the things that you do like about your job and focus on those things every day. You like that they pay you, don’t you? Do they provide you with a vacation? That would seem to be a good thing. Do you have even one co-worker you enjoy working with? That’s a plus, right? You see, what you focus on is what you will receive. There is a direct connection to how we see circumstances and how we feel. If you continuously look for the positives, your attitude will follow.
You could wake up late one day and immediately become frustrated, overwhelmed, and down right mad. Or you could choose to be happy that you had the opportunity to wake up and live another day. There are many people who won’t get the opportunity to wake up today. You did!
You can, and do, choose your attitude minute by minute every day. Have you ever become quickly frustrated with the driver who remains stopped in front of you after the light turns green? If you have, you chose to become frustrated. You could just as easily have chosen to be curious about that person, where their thoughts are or what their circumstances may be in that moment. I remember the evening I was on my way home from work. The light was green. As I was driving through the intersection, the light turned red. I was stopped behind a line of cars that didn’t make it completely through the light. A gentleman who was next to me in oncoming traffic, waiting to turn, immediately chose to be frustrated, role down his window and precede to yell at me about what an idiot I was. What I didn’t mention, and he didn’t take the time to consider, was that I was on the phone with my sister. She had called to tell me that our mother was on her way to the hospital by ambulance and may not make it there alive as she had been battling a terminal illness for over a year.
In that moment he chose to become frustrated, angry, and to share his anger by yelling at me. None of which changed or even slightly improved the situation. I’m sure it elevated his blood pressure, effected his decision-making ability over the next hour or so, and he probably spread that attitude by sharing it with as many people would listen. Now imagine if he had chosen to be curious about the drivers who seemed to be blocking his way for the next few minutes. Rather than choosing that attitude of anger and frustration, he may have chosen to be curious, understanding, let a few more cars pass, and enjoyed the remainder of his drive.
We’ve all heard that attitudes are contagious. Have you ever taken the time to realize how your attitude, good or bad is affecting you and everyone you come in contact with, and everyone they come in contact with? Have you ever had a friend, family member or coworker come to you angry, frustrated, or just to complain? How did it make you feel? I’ve used the expression “they sucked the life out of me.” (Yes, that was the attitude I chose.) Attitudes are so contagious that if they were a tiny pebble, they would have a rippling effect for miles. The boss has a poor, angry, attitude about his lack of promotion. He takes his attitude and complains to his assistant, and maybe even chastises him or her for their “lack of effort”. His assistant chooses to be angry and takes his or her attitude home to his or her spouse and let’s them have it. The spouse finds the child’s room a mess and guess what. Yes, the child becomes another ripple in the attitude chain. Likewise, when you spend time with someone who is happy (who has chosen an attitude of joy) you tend to feel joyful, probably even motivated! And my guess is that you spread that attitude with the next several people you see. The choice is yours. Will you choose to be the pebble that ripples excitement and motivation or the pebble that drowns you and those around you?
Your attitude is your choice. Choose wisely.
Choose your attitude:
- Improve Physical Health
- Increase Happiness
- Reduce Depression
- Open the Door to More and Stronger Relationships
- Experience Positive Emotions
- Love
- Joy
- Optimism
- Enthusiasm